Real vampires. Tasteful dismemberments. And delightful shivers from ten old-fashioned horror stories:

a. The Moonlight in Genevieve's Eyes: unrequited love. Tragic. Just tragic.

b. Choice: second chances are rare. Especially when you work for a vampire.

c. The Flowers in Mr. Williams' Garden: neighborhood watch, ghost style.

d. Cistern: zombies are horrible, until they hire you.

e. The Elvish Woman: lovers who steal your soul. Literally.

f. The Trumpet Inside the Warehouse: no one can hear you scream.

g. King of the Bears: be victorious, or be dinner.

h. Angel Eyes: man's best friend, when you forget your cross and garlic.

i. The Absence of Land: sell the farm, pay the consequences.

j. Face to Face: Mother's day.

So, grab a crucifix and a shotgun, say a prayer, and come on in. But, leave a clearly marked trail. It's dark in here.